i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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