lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
