No subtext here. People are naked.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
