Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
