Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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