So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
meet me or not, i'm out of control
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Randomize
