dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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