so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
