Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
You need a sexual gate keeper
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
