And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
