SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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