even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize