She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Randomize
