so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
can u get pink eye on your cock?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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