I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
