I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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