This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
