try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
