And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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