what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
wow bdsm is so cute
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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