YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
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