So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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