This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
