Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
