in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
