I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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