My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
