Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
