Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize