I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
home. puking in laundry basket.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
