if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
