ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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