He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize
