that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I want to fling myself into the sun
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
