do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize