I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
