i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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