she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
