worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
we're making bets on your personal life
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
