So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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