You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize