i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
