Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
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