How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
