i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
We named our party play list daddy issues
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize