With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
