I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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