So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I think I just sharted jello shots
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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