Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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