Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
