3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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